Magic is in the pen

Balcony scene! yay. I've made an unholy mess of it, was fun! Harry highjacks some of Juliet's lines for the purpose of parody and euphony. Hermione gets vulgar. Ron gets scandalised. Snape yells offscreen.

( Romeo and Juliet, Hogwarts Style - 3 )

Hello my friends, I'm back online and am ambulatory! I went to work! Yea, verily and suchlike I went to my lil place of work on my own two legs and I worked!

You'll have noticed I'm still a bit high with joy, I presume. And so, being so joyful and things, methought of a great idea! Why not utterly desecrate Shakespeare for one of my ignoble pastiches and spoofs? Why not indeed. So I'm rewriting Romeo and Juliet. It's all William's fault! 'My only love sprung on my only hate'...! C'mon! Who can resist it? I can't. I had a long debate about who should be who, because, of course of the 'deny thy father' thingy, but in the end I couldn't resist Voldiemort as Paris, so I think Romeo will highjack that particular piece of Juliet's rant and that will be that.

Well, I'm the parodist, I can do it.

I've also decided that, being, as it were, a double agent, Snape will have a double role: he'll both be Capulet and the Nurse. Because I'm cruel, that's why.

There'll be unabriged and abriged Shakespearean verse (I've magled quite a few) and lots of prose with thous and thees thrown in every now and then. To give it a flavour, y'know? There's also a mini-tiny-wee tribute to Maya in this section. Because she started a Veela!Harry fic and she deserves tributes.

And so, without further ado, let me present:

( ROMEO AND JULIET, HOGWARTS' STYLE )

Part Two

It won't take long, the tragedy is proceeding apace.